Lessons from Year 1

It's been about a year since I started playing poker on what I consider to be a serious basis. By that I mean that I began to read and study the game, and began to play it consciously with the intention of playing the best that I could, rather than just for fun or to gamble with friends. It's been an interesting year, to say the least. After my first final table, I experienced a relative drought of action, but have since made three more final tables in the past 3-4 months, and significantly increased my number of deep finishes. I won my first live tournament (we agreed to a chip chop, but I had the larger percentage of chips in play and won the final hand to determine the winner) in Atlantic City, and have had a lot of fun and a considerable amount of cursing and throwing of various objects, usually my hat, when I take a bad beat on the river. So clearly I still need to work on my ability to stay off tilt.

I thought I should try to quantify what I've learned over the past year, as well as spell out some objectives moving forward. There's a lot of things in flux for me right now that could impact my plans significantly over the next few months: my b/f would like to move to Vegas, I may be able to take time off work on a government VA benefit to write my dissertation (and play poker), or things could remain pretty much the same with my playing only on weekends and the occasional weeknight. But while some of my circumstances may change and influence my ability to increase my volume, I think my overall goals will probably remain the same.

So what did I learn/improve over the past year or so?

1. I no longer fold too much. I was unaware of how often I was folding with hands like middle pair against a single opponent, and I've made some corrections that have allowed me to find situations I can profitably float with position and determine my position in the hand. When I started, I pretty much never called with anything on the flop other than top pair or better.

2. I have started to learn how and when to bluff. I pretty much never bluffed when I started, not even cbetting (which I now do probably TOO often, so I've got to relearn when it's proper to check), and I've been able to pick some good spots to bluff pre (to aggressive LP raisers out of the blinds), on the flop (the EP c/r against an aggressive player on a flop that doesn't seem likely to have helped), on the turn (floating in position against one barrel bluffers) and on the river (usually with busted draws or when scare cards hit). I still don't really bluff very frequently, and I think that's probably optimal in the early stages of MTTs when no one will even fold middle pair, but in the middle late stages mixing some of these plays in at the right time has been good for me.

3. I've picked the best games for me. For better or worse, that seems to be non-turbo one table SNGs and MTTs. I think I've shown steady results in the SNGs and I have an unholy love for the MTTs that persists despite the bad beats and crushing finishes. My best is 3rd. I will hit a four figure cash, and I believe it will be sometime relatively soon...

4. I think I've improved both my post flop and board reading abilities. I'm still developing these skills, but given the sheer increase in experience I've noticed a greater ability to read board texture and react accordingly.

I'm sure there's more small improvements I've made, but it's hard to quantify. What I do know is that I still have a long, long way to go. That said, here is what I'd like to focus on improving the most over the next year.

1. My middle/late stage MTT play. This is where I seem to struggle the most, and this invariably effects my ability to get deeper and make more final tables. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong here. Picking the wrong spots for moves is part of it. Not having a solid grasp of shoving ranges is another. I plan to beg sweats from people and study more about late stage play to try to correct whatever deficiencies I can find in my play.

2. My cash game play. As much as I LOVE the MTTs, the variance is ungodly high. I believe I have a good foundation to play cash effectively as well, I just need to put in the time and make the necessary mental shifts to go from cash to tournament play. Maybe setting aside one evening session just for cash play would be useful in this regard. In any event, if we do move to Vegas and I tinker with the idea of trying to make some legitimate money playing poker, I know I'm going to have to improve my cash play, since I wouldn't be properly rolled to play the type of tournaments I believe I have the highest degree of skill in (the ones with deeper stacks and slower levels - the others pretty much play like turbos, which I'm not that great at).

3. My ability to let go of marginal hands. I'm just now starting to make the shift into classifying hands like an over pair or TPTK into the more marginal category. Previously I've been willing to put too much of my stack in with these type of hands, and it costs me a lot at different stages, I think. If I can develop the ability to exercise pot control, especially with position, I hope to be able to make more effective reads and lose less when I'm beat while still extracting value from villains who will call down with worse.

4. My patience. This is particularly true of my late stage game, since if I'm deep in an MTT I tend to play only that table, and then I get bored waiting for stuff to happen, constantly reevaluating my M, my position relative to the field, etc., etc. I'm not sure that playing a side cash game or some SNGs is the answer. If I were live, I would have to just play the one game, and I think I just deep to develop my poker patience more.

I'm sure there are more things I can improve, but that's what I have identified so far. I may be reducing my volume of play from now until about mid-December due to my upcoming comprehensive examination for my Ph.D. After that, I plan to dedicate a lot more time and energy into my poker game.

Best of luck to one and all, and I'll see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

Back to the grind

I was not absent for the summer, but for some reason I didn't feel particularly inspired to write during the summer, either.  I'm not quite sure why that was.  Part of it is certainly the fact that I can no longer blog from work; I've changed jobs, and my new employer has blocks up that prohibit looking at blogs, or anything to do with gambling or poker.  Serious bummer.  

So what did I learn/accomplish over the summer?  I'm beginning to see more nuanced post flop play out of myself - finding good spots to float the flop and take the pot away on later streets, times to call with medium strength hands, stuff like that.  I still make some comically bad reads/plays at times, but overall I think my play continues to improve.

I've also been playing a ton more MTTs.  This is mostly because I just enjoy them more, although why is beyond me.  They are much rougher on the bankroll, and the amount of astonishingly bad beats piles seem endless, making deep runs difficult.  But by the same token, I have been making deep runs with much greater frequency, so I think I'm doing something write, although I'd be lying if I said I was 100% sure what that something was.  Trying to think things through more often, trying to play my opponents holding more than my own.  

At any rate, yesterday I had my best finish to date: 5th place in a 5.50 2R1A (I've added some rebuy tourneys to my plate, although I prefer the capped rebuy tourneys much more, except for the 3R which is just fun if you approach it the right way) for about $640.  A much needed boost to my bankroll to be sure, which had suffered a particularly brutal weekend a few weeks back where I dropped over 50 buyins in a two day period.  I'm almost back to even.  My mom would be so proud of me.

But all of this rather begs the question - what exactly am I doing with this poker thing here?  I used to say, back in college, that if I could do anything, if money was no object, I would write for a living.  Now, I would add "play poker" to that.  If I could somehow get to the level where I was successful enough at poker to make a comfortable living off of it, I would do it in a second, and write about it as well.  So what are the things holding me back from this?  If I truly think I could be happy in that life, what's stopping me?

One, I'm just not that good at poker yet.  I'm getting better, I don't think there's much doubt about that, but I'm far from good enough to make a living off of it, and it doesn't help that I've been sinking most of my efforts into MTTs rather than cash or SNGs, which produce more consistent results.

Two, I'm chronically lazy.  I mean, the only thing that prevents me from writing, about poker or anything else, is a lack of effort.  I sit at a computer for literally hours during the day, at work and at home, and how often do I do some creative writing?  Close to never.  Why not?  If I would like that life, what stops me from pursuing it?  Fear, I think (and for what it's worth, I think that may be a component holding me back in poker as well).  Fear of failure.  Fear of being poor and broke and miserable.  Ultimately, I just don't think I'm that special, that I could get the world to read my stuff and pay me for the privilege.  But how do I know if I don't try?

Enough rambling out of me.  I'm done with poker for the evening (a couple of cashes and spectacular blowups/bad beats, including AK losing to J8 with both the A and K on the board, AQ < QJ AIPF, and 99 < A7o AIPF), so I'm going to spend some time with the boyfriend and clean my apartment, which looks like hobos have been squatting her for the past month.  I'm going to try to post more frequently, especially as I (hopefully) continue to learn and improve my poker game.

Until next time, good luck to all and I'll see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

Brutal honesty

Well, of my three May goals, I only completed one. I have started a pretty regular workout regime, including joining a local gym and taking kickboxing classes. They hurt, but I know myself pretty well. When it comes to exercise, I need someone to push me or I will just slack off. Kind of like, work, really. I'm much lazier than people give me credit for.

I'm going to make it a June goal to finally finish up my head's up book. For some reason this one just isn't holding my interest is much, which is odd. First, I liked Moshem's STT strategy book. Second, I like poker books (and books in general), so that can't be it. And this is a part of game that I could use some help at. I don't think finding the time is going to be hard in June, given my vacation and travel schedule coming up, so I plan to finish this one and Snyder's "Poker Tournament Formula" this month.

As for my goal to make $400 in May - um, no. It was only due to a great (for me) finish in a largish MTT yesterday that allowed me to break even. I placed 13th in the $22 30K on Stars yesterday for an almost $250 cash. A heartbreaking finish, though, since the hand I busted out on was QQ vs. AKo, and the A hit the river. Had I won that hand, I would have jumped to 5th place and it would have been fairly likely not only that I would make final table, but also that I would cash for 4 figures for the first time (which started at 7th place). Still, since I myself had sucked out with AK twice earlier (vs. TT when I hit a K and vs. KK when I flopped a straight) I couldn't be too upset. There was no way I was folding QQ, and no way villain (who had a huge stack) was folding AK, and after that the cards fell as they fell.

Still, the fact that May was a slightly losing month for me was distressing. At one point, I was up almost $300. The first part of May I felt close to invincible, cashing in close to 1/2 of my tournaments (STTs and 2-3 table SNGs, mostly). Then during the second half of May, it was brutal beat after brutal beat.

So what can I do to fix this? I'm trying for brutal honesty here, but there's one thing that's getting in the way of identifying an easy "fix" - I actually think I was, for the most part, playing pretty well. There was a stretch where I was not only losing all my coin flips, I was also losing almost every hand where I was the clear preflop favorite and all of our chips got in preflop. They were all pretty "standard" beats by themselves - JJ vs. 55, KK vs. ATs, QQ vs. AJs are just some examples - but I was losing far more than I was statistically likely to, with only infrequent suckouts of my own to compensate. Also, for some reason, almost all of my dominating A hands (AJ vs. A2, for example) have been losing. There have been some circumstances where I played a hand badly (bad read, bad call), and I haven't factored those into my analysis, but during the last part of May I was losing between 65-70% of hands where I was at least 50% or greater to win when all the money went in. Also, for some reason, my KKs were running at like 35%, which is far lower than they should.

Still, I have come to this understanding - I am, right now, only a break even player, or maybe very marginally winning. And I don't make enough during my "up" streaks to compensate when variance (and the declining but still occurring bad decisions on my part) decides to smack me upside the head.

So my fixes for this current run include:

1. Less bitching. I'm pretty sure my b/f is sick of listening to it, and frankly I'm kind of sick of doing it. Donks play badly and suck out. My AK gets trounced by A6. I've got to get numb to it at some point, and I think that will come more easily if I just resolve not to stew about it.

2. Stick to my limits. I was trying to mix in some $22 STTs, and my results weren't bad, but my roll can't really handle the fluctuations right now. Although I will still play my new favorite donkament - the $22 30K. I like the smaller field, and I seem to get a little deeper in this one. Plus I just got really deep yesterday. So I have a special fondness for this one right now.

3. Mix more MTTs in with the STTs, but drop down to the $5 tables for this. I need more experience with pushbotting and aggression for the large MTTs, and that often doesn't really come up in the STTs, particularly when we are down to only 5 people by the 3rd level.

4. Find a mentor and keep learning/grinding.

I'll be on vacation for 2 1/2 weeks in June, which will cut down on my volume and probably lose my newly (and surprisingly) acquired Silver Star status on Stars. Anyway, good luck to one and all, and see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

Back on track

After being variance's redheaded step child for a a couple of weeks, I again had a very good weekend. Trying to remain analytical about everything, here are the reasons I believe I have started winning again:

1. I dropped down to one table play. Smaller payouts, but fewer people to beat as well, and since I like the style from a book that was specifically designed for single table tournaments, it makes a frightening amount of sense that actually playing that style at a single table might show results.

2. Taking breaks. I have to force myself to do it (I can be a touch obsessive), but I think it has been helping to have cooling off and re-energizing periods. My play can get a touch sloppy when I've taken a bad beat at times, but with breaks those loses don't "accumulate" past a certain level.

Whatever the reason, I cashed in just over half of the tournaments I played this weekend (20/39), and most of those cashes were 1st and 2nd places (only two 3rds and a min-cash in my weekly donkament). I also had a couple of bubble busts that statistically "should" have gone my way (KK vs. JJ & AA vs. 33), but I think these were mediated by the standard "bad beats" I dealt out myself (sucking out against a low pair with AK, one massive triple up when I made a questionable decision to chase the NFD and got paid off by both villains on the river when I hit).

April is almost over, and my dreams of grinding up quickly have been squashed (as they should), so I thought I'd set more realistic goals for May:

1. Post a gain of $400 for the month. This may be either wildly high or low; I've made as much as $250 in a single weekend, but my results have been pretty variant lately and I'm not sure how much ROI to expect long term yet; I'll also be playing more starting the middle of May - potentially a couple of hours daily - so maybe I'll consider using May/June as baseline months to see how much I could reasonable expect to generate at my current skill level.
2. Read strategy book on head's-up play (to change some of those 2nd place finishes to 1st)
3. Incorporate a workout schedule along with a poker schedule to stick to now that internship is finishing and I'll have a ton more free time.

I was pretty encouraged by this past weekend's results, but I'm going to do my best to keep look looking at things analytically, finding the holes in my game, and steadily improving.

Best of luck to one and all, and I'll see you at the tables.
SGT RJ

Live play, donks, and musings

I spent four days in Vegas a few weeks ago, and of course the vast majority of that time was spent at the poker tables. I finished slightly ahead in tournament play (coming in 2nd in a small rebuy tournament, and 3rd in a sit and go), and a little down in cash play. Since I lost the vast majority of the money I did lose in a couple of hands when I had great (but not quite good enough) hand, I feel pretty good about this. When you get all-in with AA and KK sucks out, I don't feel that's a reflection of my play. It's just variance. I did make a new resolution to never slowplay anything weaker than a strong flush after I picked up trip aces while holding AK on an AAx flop and checked it, allowing someone holding a pair of eights to pick up the full house on the turn. I also learned that the computerized poker tables at the Ex Caliber are an absolute fish tank - once I got over the annoyance of playing on a computer, which is what I do when I'm NOT in Vegas, the perks of not having a dealer to tip (still a rake, though) and being able to feast on complete noobs who would stack off with just about ATC made it the place my boyfriend and I decided to play most frequently. We'll probably play there again next time we go back, and I'll definitely play the Venetian $150 noon tourney again. I outlasted half the field both times, and both times I made it to ante play with a nice stack, so if nothing else I feel like my ability to collect some chips in the early stages of a tournament has improved significantly. I have a problem switching gears in the middle stages, but hopefully by the next time I go back I'll have made some progress there as well. Just a great tourney, though, deep stacked and slow enough to allow for some play other than fold or shove.

Since I've been back home, it's online on the weekends again. I've been finding it difficult at times to not get really wound up when I take a horrible beat from some donk who had no real business being in the hand. For example, I make a standard 3BB raise from UTG +2 and get called by one player on my immediate left. Flop is AJ4 rainbow, so I've picked up TPTK and bet about 3/4 of the pot, which he calls. Turn is another blank, another lead out by me and another call. At this point I'm starting to get a little concerned - did he pick up trips and is letting me just bet into him? Still, the river is a 7, another blank as far as I can tell, so another bet. He calls, and shows down 47o. Wow, just...wow.

But really, aren't these the players you want to play against? The donks who will call with ATC and call down largish bets with bottom pair, weak kicker? It's just so infuriating when they suck out on the river that I get wound up, and I'm sure it affects my play, although my new habit of taking breaks has cut down on that, I think. I'm just not sure what, if anything, I should do differently here. Bet smaller to control pot size against an opponent I know won't fold if he hit any piece (including a gut shot straight draw) of the flop? Maybe a way I could reframe it so that I don't get riled up?

Anyway, I just feel like I don't know where I'm at right now. My results have been steadily off since I hit my peak about 5 weeks ago. I can't tell if it's variance, bad play, or a combination of the two (I'm leaning towards the third option here). I find myself making better, smarter plays sometimes (I was more attuned to weak looking donk bets this weekend thanks to some 2+2 forum discussion, and successfully snapped off several of them), and I don't think I'm making the same bad plays as often, but my results are off and I don't know what to do to fix that. I think part of it has to be patience - I've only been playing seriously for about 6 months now, and to expect to be posting gains every weekend isn't realistic. But how can I find more of my weak spots to improve?

Well, that's all from me for now. Good luck to one and all, and I'll see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

Adjustments

So, not a good weekend. Again. I was up a little Friday night, ran completely cold again Saturday (not a single cash), then did well Sunday morning but crashed again in the evening. The good news is I did not tilt nearly as badly, even when running poorly. The bad news is my plans to be able to double up by the end of the month are unlikely without some sort of miracle run.

I think some adjustments are in order. I'm going to try to make these adjustments because I am serious about improving my game. I think running hot even for a short period of time led me to think too far ahead instead of focusing on what I am doing in the present. I'm going to try to fix that by implementing some changes not only to my game, but to some of the things peripheral to it.

First, I've moved back down in stakes to the $5 tables. This was mostly a decision to slow the bleeding; I'm still up for the month (and for my poker "career"), so my original bankroll is intact and I could easily afford to stay at the $10 SNG level. There's not a whole lot of difference ability wise that I can tell, but until I gain (or regain?) a sense of mastery over the level, I'll stay with the $5 tables and start mixing the $10 tables back in when I'm feeling more confident.

Second, I need to tighten up just a little bit. I got my hands on a free trial of some poker software that will run on my Mac, and my line looks a little too loose - 24/15. I think I may have been trying to open up my starting hand requirements a little too indiscriminately, and this current slide in results may be the price. I know I can't wait for the big hands, but I need to do a better job picking my spots. So it's back to extra tight play in the early stages of tournaments; I will only get involved with more speculative hands when A) I'm getting a great price to do so or B) I can articulate a specific reason for my action other than "I'm bored" or "I need to try something".

Third, I will ask myself "What is the purpose of this bet?" before committing chips. I will also begin thinking ahead as to what I will do in the event of a call/raise on the part of my opponent before betting. Because I've been successful at adding c-betting to my arsenal (maybe too successful), I often fire without thinking it through all the way. I've got to think more as I play as opposed to act/react.

Fourth, I will not play poker on the weekends before I work out. This is because I am trying to increase my discipline overall, and since I want to play poker, but often don't really want to exercise, this seemed like a good way to instill some discipline in a way I know I will follow through on. Inspiration from this came from my boyfriend, who will not play until he has studied for an hour (he would like to take the actuary exam at some point). He procrastinates far more than I do, but he's faithful to this nonetheless. I am two for two on this point so far.

Fifth, I will drastically reduce the number of donkaments I play. I really enjoy donkaments, and of course the allure of a 4 or 5 figure payout for actually taking one down is tempting. However, at this point I am not cashing enough to make it a good bankroll investment. My ROI for SNGs is over 20%. That seems like the logical place to focus for now. I will therefore only play in one major donkament per weekend. This will probably be the 1 pm $5.50 (15K guaranteed) - I have a soft spot for that one, as it is the only donkament I have ever made final table at.

Sixth, I will take breaks. I can't set a specific time frame on how long I will play before breaks since my preferred poker medium, the SNG, does not have a start/end time. Instead, I will play no more than 8 consecutive tournaments before taking a break of at least an hour. I'm hoping this will not only help in maintaining disciple and balance, but will also help with a trend I've noticed that I tend to do much better at the start of the day than at the end. I'm still not sure yet if this is because the game are softer in the mornings on the site where I play or if I'm just more on my game then.

Anyway, these are the adjustments I'm going to make in order to get back to my consistently winning ways. I'll be in Vegas this next weekend, so it's four days of live play in the immediate future. I may also be able to fit in a couple of hours one night this week - it's spring break at my school, which means no back to back classes on Wednesday night. Bliss.

Good luck to everyone, and I'll see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

Down to earth

It seems as though the down side of variance caught up with me this weekend. I ran pretty well again on Saturday, up around $100, with a couple of 1st place finishes in 2 and 3 table SNGs. I was so close to my goal of doubling my initial deposits I could almost smell it. I started imagining that I would actually triple up before I even cleared my bonus, and maybe start thinking about moving up in stakes.

And then Sunday happened.

Because of my school/work/internship schedule, I can really only play on weekends, which invariably means I play quite a lot on weekends to "make up" for the time I can't play during the week. This also means that if I start to either run cold or I'm not on my A game (and I'd like to state, for the record, that I am well aware that my A game is more like a true professionals C game, and that's being generous), I feel like I need to continue since I won't be able to play again any time soon.

In any event, I wasn't too shaken by the first couple of coolers and suckouts. I mean, aces get cracked, although having them cracked by queens isn't any fun. But they started to add up. In the course of several hours (two tabling $5 and $10 SNGs with the odd donkament mixed in), I ran into aces while holding kings (and I was unable to pull the suckout, of course), had a pair of cowboys cracked by A/T when two tens hit, the second on the river, had pushes with jacks called twice by overcards (and one or both of the overcards hit), had a pair of tens cracked by A/5 (when he flopped a wheel), and ran a nut flush into a full house. It may have been the worst run of cards/luck I've encountered in that short of a period of time, compounded by the fact that I got on tilt (which I'm normally pretty good at avoiding) and started playing either too nitty or too aggressive, depending on what phase of tilt emotions I was on (anger or despair).

All told, I ended up down about $180 and did not cash in a single tournament. Looks like it might take longer to double up than I thought.

Running hot

This weekend was far and away my best ever, results wise. I know I'm not supposed to be "results oriented", and I get that in regards to specific hands - you shouldn't fret about busting with aces when your opponent catches a two outer on the river, since you got your money in with the best hand and that's the result you want to see - but I have to think that overall, results do matter in the sense that, if I'm getting better, I should be seeing better results. Right?

I ran completely cold Friday night, not a single cash in any of the tournaments I entered, down about $70 on the evening. Then Saturday I started off in spectacular fashion, cashing in 6 of my first 12 tournaments, including three first places and a fifth place at a 20 table event. I ended on a relatively sour note (0-7, I think), but I was still up significantly on the day. That held over into Sunday, and while I didn't get any first place finishes, I did finish 2nd three times with a couple of other cashes and ended up pushing my total winnings on the weekend to about $260.

How do I think I played? Overall pretty well, especially on Sunday when I started to run a little card dead and was still able to push deep in some of the tourneys. I only made one or two bone headed plays - overvaluing top pair (again!) and donking for trips on the river against a pair of queens, and not respecting a tight opponents aggression and giving them credit for a much better hand than mine aces with a weakish kicker, allowing them to double up at my expense - but overall I thought I was making some good plays. I consciously adjusted my play for the first time against a player I correctly deduced was playing a weak-passive style, busting him when I flopped two pair and value bet him all in by the river.

I am a little concerned that, in my effort to become more aggressive, I may be crossing over that fine line occasionally into loose aggressive play. I'm certainly not raising/calling/betting with any two cards, and I'm still not really capable of making that huge river bluff, but I felt almost wild at one point, especially in the last tournament I played on Sunday when I went to final 9 with almost triple the stack of anyone else. Was my fourth place finish in that tournament (rather than the 1st or 2nd I had already mentally assigned myself when the table started) a warning? Other than my misread of my head to head in the blinds match-up against a tight player I should have given credit for a better hand, I thought that my relatively poor finish was the result of lucky breaks for my opponents (a short stack pushing with K/5 and catching his three outer five when I called with K/Qs, for instance), but maybe I loosened up too much. I'll keep an eye on this and see what I can learn.

I won't have as much time to play this weekend, but I'm hopeful I may be able to double my deposits by the end of the month and start preparing to play on nothing but money I've won. Ultimately, I think I'd like to at least be able to play well enough to make some extra money I can use to rebuild my retirement funds. I'd like to think maybe I can go even further than that, but I'm trying to be realistic in my goals.

Good luck to all, and I'll see you at the tables.

Why I play

While I admit I have an extremely vague and entirely unrealistic fantasy of actually being a poker pro, I'm grounded enough to realize that isn't very likely to happen. I'm playing basically break-even poker, and as I don't have the time to devote to improving my game immediately, I will continue to do my best and work steadily to improve. I think a more realistic short-term goal would be to become an overall winning player, but it seems unlikely I will become a winning player at large enough levels to allow me to quit my day job any time soon.

I did, however, experience a hand this weekend that really clarified why I enjoy this game so much, and why I'll continue to play (even at break even levels) for the foreseeable future. It helps, of course, that I was holding the absolute nuts. Deep stack tournament, $5000 in chips to start and 30 minutes levels, and I'm sitting on an average stack (around 35000) with the blinds at 400/800 (75 antes), I believe. I get to see the flop for free in the big blind holding Q/9d. Five players see the flop, which includes the 8 and 10 of diamonds. The betting on the flop and the turn give me more than enough odds to chase both the flush and gut shot straight draws. The Jack of diamonds on the river gave me the straight flush (my first in online tournament play), and when I pushed, hoping my only remaining opponent would read it for desperation or that he was holding the Ace high flush, I was literally ecstatic when he called and I doubled up (holding the 7/8 of diamonds, incidentally, for a much weaker flush even had the final diamond to hit not been the Jack).

That single hand, with all of the various decisions (do I bet my draw in early position? Smooth call or raise? Check raise the river? Raise or push when he bet?) and knowing with absolute certainty that I had the best hand was such a high. I understand how people can become addicted to the thrill of the win. Thank heavens this was an online tournament, because my hands were shaking for 10 minutes afterwards.

I play because winning is that much fun. I play because poker combines the intellectual prowess of numbers manipulation with psychology and the endorphin rush of danger, triumph and defeat. I play because that feeling is better than the lows of getting pocket rockets cracked by your opponent holding cowboys when one of his two outs hits the river (which also happened this weekend).

Knowing that part of why I play is for the joy of the win should motivate me to play better poker, the more consistently with which to win and experience that feeling, right? If I can just use this memory during those times I'm feeling discouraged after another bad beat or bad play, I might be able to survive the emotional component of this game.

Good luck, and I'll see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

Depression and Elation

Yesterday was probably the lowest I have ever felt in my poker "career".  I'd certainly lost more money before (my first trip to Vegas, when I was comically unaware of just how bad I was), but never felt as discouraged.  Between my horrible run Friday night online (6 tournaments, no cashes, card dead and suck outs galore) and my day in Atlantic City yesterday, I was actually considering not playing at all, at least for a while.  I want to get better at poker, but if there's no fun to be had, what's the point?

I entered a tournament in AC first - 50/12 buy in, 110 entrants.  20 minute levels, 10000 in chips. I lasted past the first break, which considering I saw no hand higher than 10s (one AK, if I remember) and was sitting to the left of a LAG big stack who raised every time I picked up something that I would consider raising, but not calling with, I thought this was a decent finish.  I ended up getting busted when, in the BB and short stacked (under 400 with the blinds at 400/800 and 75 antes), I picked up a small pocket pair (6s).  UTG +1 raises to 2000, and when another person called, I knew I had to push with a pair and a ton of dead money in the pot.  The initial raiser re-raised all in to isolate - I was pretty scared he had jacks or higher at that point - and ended up in a coin flip when he turned over A/9 suited.  He caught a 9 on the river to bust me, which is mediocre luck but I wasn't too discouraged with that.  I only made on obvious mistake I could see in the tourney - I raised a jack high flop with J/Qo, was raised all in by a short stack, and misinterpreted a call by another player as a raise and folded, believing I was outkicked.  I would have won a decent pot with trip Jacks (the other three players in were all on the same flush draw), and this taught me a valuable lesson in live play.  If confused about the action, ask.  And possibly take out both earbuds when actually in a hand.  I felt pretty stupid after that one, but I don't think it was a fatal blow.  

My time at the cash tables was more discouraging.  Still card dead (no pair higher than 10s, an average number of A high hands), and I ended up losing about $200 when I flopped trips into a flush draw board.  I bet the proper amount to chase out a draw, but when one of the four people in the hand called with top pair, the draw called as well and caught it on the turn.  This left me feeling pretty low, a feeling that persisted for the rest of the night.

I hadn't seen queens or aces in four days (I had seen kings online twice in those two days).  It felt like I was losing every coin flip and missing every flop.  I know those kind of streaks are inevitable, but since I'm dedicated to getting better it was very discouraging.  Was the entire thing a product of bad cards, bad situations, and bad luck, or was (is) there a gaping hole in my game that I couldn't see and therefore couldn't attempt to remedy?  I know some of my overall weaknesses that I'm struggling to improve (a tendency to overvalue top pair, not betting when it's my only chance to win the pot and I think I could get others to fold, being too wary of firing a second bullet when my flop continuation raise is called), but was (is) there something else I'm missing?

Today helped restore some badly needed confidence.  I busted out midway through of the first 10 table SNG I entered (full house to a better full house), but then won a 10 table 5.50 tournament.  I got my first pair of aces in four and a half days (at a very opportune time, too, vs a shorter stack all in with jacks) and managed to finally beat out my third all in with my shorter stacked head's up opponent (I pushed him all in three times, and three times he flipped over a pair, including jacks and aces on his first two hands) when I caught an ace high flush to his pair of nines.  Almost $124 (putting back at even for my online career), and a huge sigh of relief. Not that I think I don't still have work to do on my game, but I was starting to believe that I was so woefully out of my depth that perhaps I should give up.  I really don't think that's the case, but it's also nice to have that reassurance that sometimes the breaks will fall my way.

Lessons from this previous stretch:

1.  I need to develop (and/or use) a better sense of when a second bullet will do the trick.  I didn't trust my instincts during the cash game that an all-in re-raise would win the hand (as he admitted he would have after the hand).  I have a hard time betting with a bluff even when I think my opponent might fold.  While this isn't something I'd ever want to do indiscriminately, I think of it as a more "advanced" skill I need to develop and hone.

2.  Bad luck and dry streaks happen, and they suck.  I'm not quite sure what the best way to deal with them is.  Play through the pain?  Take a break and wait for the "luck" to return?  I understand it's all mathematics, but when the breaks are constantly going against you, you start to wonder.  

3.  I am infinitely more comfortable at tournaments than I am at cash games.  I know how to exploit this online, but it's trickier in live play, I think, especially if you are waiting between tourneys.  Should I just forgo the cash games for now, or try to develop this part of my game in concert with improving my tournament play?  

I need to finish the tournament I'm in right now (another 10 table 5.50, currently in 6th place with 23 remaining), so I'll finish this for now.  I won't be playing live again until Vegas in March (probably), so until then it's online play for me.  Good luck to all, and see you on the tables.

SGT RJ

Saved by the river

Like a lot of poker players, I think I fall prey to the idea that the luck always bounces the way of the other player.  That it's always my aces getting cracked by the donk who calls with 6/8 and catches two pair.  But the truth of the matter is, of course, that while streaks can happen, they are purely random, and "luck" in the form of catching winners on the river doesn't always happen to my opponent.  Sometimes, it happens for me.

I'm sitting in a tourney right now, the 1 p.m. 5.50 (15K guaranteed) on PokerStars.  One of my favorites, actually, because the blinds don't increase too fast, and of course the pay-off for advancing deep is nice compared to the buy in (first place today is almost $3370).   I'm only still in this thing because I, too, have been a benefactor of luck.  For instance...

5th level (75/150 blinds), and I'm already relatively short (about 1600).  I catch AKs on the button.  Early middle position raises to 500, the guy right next to him calls, everyone folds to me.  I have to put one of them on a pair at least, possibly a big one (from the first raiser - since the caller didn't reraise, I don't have him on a premium pair), but there's a lot of money in the pot relative to my stack, and AKs is a good hand.  Expecting that both will call, I push, and both do call (putting one of them all in as well).  The hands turn over to reveal QJs from the first raiser (I wouldn't raise with it from that position, and I was grateful not to see AA-QQs) and 99 from the caller.  Flop is Kxx, but the two smaller cards are both clubs, the suit of Mr. QJ.  I'm dismayed when the K of clubs hit the turn, giving me trips but the other guy a K high flush.  But the river brought an ace, giving me Ks full, and I live to fight some more.

Much later now, I call an all in for about half my stack (9th level, I think), he turns over AJo to my 99.  A jack hits the flop, and I'm mentally grousing about being reduced to all in or fold mode, but a 9 hit the river to give me 9s full of Ks (K on the flop and turn).

Finally, on level 13 (600/1200, 125 antes, I have about 16K), I'm again looking at an M of under 10 and I catch QJs in the big blind.  There's a minraise from the cutoff, both the small blind and myself call.  The flop is A/Q/x (nothing in my suit), and when the small blind checks I bet 5000.  He raises me all in, and I call, hoping that he was bluffing the ace to pressure a short stack to fold (something I try occasionally).  Sadly, I was wrong, but a J on the river gave me two pair.

Of these hands, I only regret the way I played the last one (I considered shoving preflop, which I prefer now to the semi-bluff on the flop).  The others were just decent cards and luck.  I think it's important to remember that luck happens for me, too.  

For example, not one minute ago I caught AKo to a short stacks AQs, and my hand held up.  Statistically, it's supposed to, but surviving these scenarios is crucial to getting deep into tourneys.  Like earlier, when I got my first (and only pair, so far) of aces and got pushed on by 77s, who failed to improve.  I haven't gotten as many premium pocket pairs this tourney so far (only once each with the big three, although I have had AK at least 3 times, and AQ a couple more), but I think I'm making decent decisions so far, and getting the bounces when I need them.

Well, I ended up out in 146th place (out of 5265 entries) when my pocket fives ran into aces.  I'm up for the day, anyway, and that's always nice, and I think I played pretty well.  Best of luck to one and all, and I'll see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

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Hangin' in there

I definitely had a better weekend this time around - I'm back on the plus side of the column for my online poker career after a 2nd place finish in a 20 table, 4.40 SNG tourny. And as much as I like to bitch about bad beats (for instance, dealt pocket rockets, I got called on my preflop 4BB raise by two people; the flop is T/8/x rainbow, first guy bets 350 into a 600 dollar flop, other guy folds, I raise to 800, he calls; turn is a 9, and since the straight draw is now much more likely and because my remaining stack is only about 65% of the pot, I push; he calls and turns over...T/9 offsuit, for two pair - you cannot make this shit up), I know that luck is a factor. And I also know (and my boyfriend loves to remind me) that while it FEELS like the luck always bounces against me, sometimes it saves my hide.

The fact that I even made final table at this tourny was relatively impressive. I was down early and managed to scrape and claw my way back. Nothing luckier than surviving a couple of coin tosses, but even that is luck. I was always near the bottom of the stacks, but people kept busting out ahead of me, until I found myself in the final three with the short stack.

The big stack was, for lack of a better description, a confusing player. He was routinely raising odd amounts, then immediately folding to a reraise. I ended up in a pot with him holding K/6 offsuit. The flop was pretty junky, Q/x/x rainbow with no straight draws, so when this guy bet, I decided to push. Not because I had a great hand, of course, but since he had been raising and folding so much in previous hands, and because I know most flops miss most hands, I thought this would be a good steal opportunity. Bad read, because he turned over Q/x for top pair, and had me more than covered chip wise. I laughed and shrugged, ready to appreciate my better than expected finish, when runner runner 6s hit the turn and river to give a highly improbable set.

Heads up was odd with this guy, and I was ahead at one point, but I ended up crippled when he caught a small pocket pair the same hand I landed A/Q suited and failed to improve. Still, I think the lesson here is to try to focus on those times when you do get lucky (even if that luck is surviving a coin toss) instead of constantly focusing on the improbable beats delivered by the donks who don't know to fold top pair, weak kicker and end up getting lucky on the turn or river.

Anyway, I'll be able to play live in a couple weeks (AC, but only a day trip so it will probably be ring game). Good luck, and I'll see you at the tables.

SGT RJ

Hard times

I actually reached a point this weekend where I felt like I really hated this game. It seemed like I could not catch a break. On Saturday, I ended up calling with small to large pocket pair on five separate occasions against a short stack that pushed. On all of those occasions, the short stack turned over a smaller pocket pair - 9s vs. 8s, 8s vs. 7s, Qs vs 8s, 9s vs. 4s, and another I can recall. On FOUR of the five times, the lower pair flopped their set to win the pot. Now, I know sets happen. About 1 out of every 8 times, which is 12.5%. Not 80%. Couldn't catch a straight or a flush (unless I had already folded of course), close to bone dry on big pocket pairs and A/K or A/Q combinations. When I got busted out of another tournament (again) holding pocket jacks to A/To when the board came A/K/J/A/K (and yes, that was the order, so I filled out my full house before he did and got counterfeited on the river), I was seriously on tilt.

Oddly enough, I actually did okay on my last tournament of the day (9th out of 180), but I don't think I have ever been that frustrated by this game. I know, the bad beats and bad runs happen. I guess it just seems like it happened at a time when I thought I was improving, and now I'm doubting that pretty seriously. I'm rereading (or listening, actually, since I have it on audiobook) to Gordon's Little Green Book, so I am feeling a little calmer, but I actually feel a small hint of dread about playing right now. When is my (technically) better play going to pay off with better results? Is there still a serious gap in my play I need to plug? For the record, I believe there are smaller holes that still need work, but I thought I was making solid advancement in my core skills, and this recent relatively dry spell is seriously sapping my confidence.

The best of luck, the worst of luck

Now that school is back in session (I'm a graduate student), the vast majority of my poker playing will be on weekends. While I've been keeping records of my tournament play for the past couple of weeks to try to get a handle on some patterns, I experienced two recent runs that I think will be positive learning experiences for me down the line.

The first was two weekends ago (the weekend after Christmas), when I ended up on a dry spell. No matter what tournament I played (all at micro or low stakes), I could not seem to catch a break. Small pair? Either someone raised a large amount and I was forced to throw away the hand preflop, or I would limp in and be forced to throw the hand away when the board brought nothing but high cards. Never filled out a straight or a flush if I'd been playing with proper odds to draw. Coin flips all seemed to break towards my opponent. I remember starting to get immensely frustrated, and in retrospect that would seem to argue strongly for taking a break, no? I won/placed in one or two small table SNGs, but overall a went dry for a solid two days, the first time that has ever happened to me. I've read it's all part of the game. Not a part I can say I enjoyed much.



Then, this past weekend, I ended up with the best hour of cards I can ever recall seeing. $5.50 large tournament, $15,000 prize pool guaranteed (actual prize pool - over $28,000). 3000 in chips to start, 15 minute levels with five minute breaks after each hour. In the first hour of play, I experienced the following: 9 sets of pairs preflop, including three times with pocket aces and one time with pocket kings. Twice with my aces I had someone push on me (both times post flop); the first the flop came Jxx, and my single opponent pushed with J/Q unsuited. The second time the flop was 884, and my single opponent pushed with pocket 6s. I didn't make anywhere near as much on any of my other pocket pairs (everyone folded to me preflop with my kings, one of my two sets of pocket 9s lost to A/Q, my other set of pocket nines flopped a full house with 9KK and my opponent folded the instant I bet the turn), but between those two huge hands, my good reads and good cards, and my ability to keep my losses when they occur ed to a relative minimum, I had more than tripled my chips in the first hour. I was feeling really, really good about my chances to make a deep run. I was well over double the chip average, had no need to fear the blinds or take huge risks, and could use my position and chip stack to continue building. While I certainly didn't expect my rush of great cards to continue (or my good luck in not having my large pairs cracked), I was feeling confident.



Maybe too confident.



All that work and luck was completely undone by a single hand in the second hour. I'm holding J/9 suited in the BB, there was a single min raise a multiple limpers, meaning I had more than enough pot odds to put in the extra big blind with pretty much any two cards. The flop brought a J with no obvious straight or flush draws. I bet out (my tendency when I possibly, but not absolutely, have the best hand and I'm first or almost first to act - I'd like to buy the pot cheaply if no one else hit the flop, and will hopefully get some information based off of what subsequent people choose to do - call, fold, or raise) just under half the pot. I think 4 of the 7 people folded right then, with two callers. Flop brought another rag as far as I could tell, so I bet again (first to act now) more strongly now, about 3/4 of the current pot. Next person to act folded, final person left in the hand raised.



I don't really know what I was thinking at this point. I try to constantly remind myself not to overvalue top pair, especially with a weak kicker. As far as cards on the board went, if the other person didn't have a straight or a flush (neither of which was possible at this point, if I remember correctly), then only the other two jacks with better kickers, or a paired kicker, or a lower pair of pairs, or trips, could beat me. Still, that's a lot of possibilities, and my opponent was certainly telling me he had a good hand. He hadn't raised preflop (this person was not the minimum raiser), so I didn't put him on any of the premium pair or trip jacks. Still, if I had actually sat and thought, really thought rather than just blindly ride the wave of good fortune I had had up to that point, I think I would have folded at that point. Instead, I reraised, was reraised again all in, and like the donk I soon felt like I called. At which point my opponent turned over A/J, and all but just under $1000 of my chips was gone, just like that.



I managed to last until just after the second hour break - a couple of fortuitous all-in pushes that allowed me to double-up, a couple of all-in blind steals, but I ended up busting in 1407th place, well back off the money. I like to think I learned something from this (or relearned it as the case may be):



1. Top pair, weak kicker is a hand just asking for trouble. Optimally, I should have tried to keep that pot small, as my hand was relatively small. Even if the aggression by my opponent was a bluff with middle pair or top pair with an even weaker kicker, was it really worth my entire tournament to make that stand right there? Obviously, no. Small hand, small pot. I need to add that to my list of things to tell myself pretournament (something I had done with some success earlier, I might add).



2. Good fortune in a previous hand (or hands) has no bearing on the current hand. Just like all bad runs come to an end, so do all "rushes". Just because you are feeling lucky doesn't mean you are. I do believe that I let my optimistic outlook for my overall tournament prospects override my common sense on this hand.



3. One hand can make all previous work vanish. It usually takes many hands, and much patience, to build a chip stack (especially since my default style is pretty tight). Trying to focus and maintain that patience, while not losing all aggression or letting myself get pushed around, may be a tricky thing for me to balance.



Definitely a learning experience, and a harsh one, for this poker neophyte.



See you at the tables.



SGT RJ

The following is a slightly edited rewrite of a note I wrote the day after my best ever finish (monetarily) in an online tournament, which occurred on Sunday, December 14th, 2008.

So yesterday (Sunday) I decided to wait to bake cookies and do the dishes until after Ian got up; with all the banging around, I figured it was the least I could do. Plus, this gave me a built in excuse to do something quiet - play internet poker. I figured I would enter my last tournament around the 1 pm kick off of the Redskins game, which would be the earliest Ian would emerge from the bedroom, and take care of the random things I needed or wanted to do after I busted out of the tournament.

The best laid plans often do not go according to plan.

Eight hours later, I finally busted out of the tournament. It is telling of our relationship that this poker marathon didn't irritate Ian one little bit (or if it did, he certainly hid it well). Anyway, there were a couple of hands I felt were key. I almost busted quite early (well before places started getting paid, which started at 810th place) when I ended up all in with pocket 10s vs big slick (Ace/King). I was relatively short stacked, and so opted to push with this hand after a standard 3BB raise from the player UTG, and everyone folded around to the original raiser, who called. When both the flop and the turn produced a king, I figured I was toast, but when I spiked a 10 on the river I realized, after the chips had already been sent my way, that the resulting full house beat his trips. Catching that two outer allowed me to stay in and rebuild my chip stack.

In my next big hand, I ended up with A/Q in the big blind. UTG raised a standard amount, and everyone folded to me, and I called. I opted for the call here rather than a reraise because of the position of the raiser, wanting to play cautiously under what I assumed was a pretty strong hand; the big pairs down to Jacks, possibly A/K through A/J. In retrospect, I might have wanted to attempt to raise him off the hand; A/Q is a strong hand, but can be tricky to play post flop (as was the case here), and if he didn't have a premium pair I might have been able to scare him off. Still, I called, and the flop came Ace, Jack, Ten. I bet (around half the pot, I think), and he raised all-in. A scary decision, as Ace/King, Ace/Jack, Ace/Ten, or Js or Tens would have me beat (as would aces, but the odds of that, with one on the board and one in my hand, seemed minuscule). I had top pair, second best kicker, and a gut shot straight draw, but what could he have? Two pair or trips scared me, but I decided that his most likely holding was pocket Kings, rationalizing that if he (or she) had actually flopped either two pair or a set he'd bet lower to keep me around. I don't like this rationale as much now - while there were no flush draws that I recall, there was certainly a blindingly obvious straight draw, so someone with two pair or a set very well could opt to push to punish a possible draw. Still, I decided I wasn't beat, took a deep breath and clicked the call button, and was elated when he turned over Ace...9. This hand allowed me to start playing with a relatively large stack, which is definitely a good thing.

I ended up with enough chips to survive a long dry spell at one point. Otherwise, the next couple of hours seemed to be a steady progression of waves - I would peak, then lose a bit, then surge back with my next peak being higher than the last. I was helped a couple of times by short stacks that I called (with proper pot odds to do so) who didn't catch what they needed on the board (or I did). I was also helped immensely by a dream hand - small blind, and the antes were such that it was mathematically correct to call with just about any two cards, so I called with 5/3 suited and the big blind didn't raise, allowing me to see the flop cheaply. The flop - 3, 3, 3. Quads, and when I checked-called his flop raise, then check-called his turn raise all-in, I suddenly had a very healthy stack.

It was a pretty weird experience for me at that point. I've won online tournaments before, but only small ones. My best place in a largish tournament to that point was 3rd place in a 180 person tournament. I had never even gotten into the money in one of these giant tourneys before, and had never played with over 1 million in chips. The growing potential to actually win such a large tournament would seem, to me, to confirm that I have at least some vague idea of what I'm doing, poker wise. You do not win a tournament that size on blind luck alone. Alas, it was not to be. Down to two tables, and I'm in third or fourth place overall. The table is pretty tight, with most pots being won preflop or on a bet after the flop. I'm in the big blind with Q/8 offsuit, and the small blind, a pesky guy who has seemed to be catching cards against me since we ended up on this table, just completes the small blind. I decide that Q/8 is good enough to try to push him off, so I raise 3 times the big blind, and he calls. The flop - Q/9/8. Two pair, which is pretty close to a dream flop. My memory is a little fuzzy, but I think the betting sequence went like this - he checked, I bet, he raised, I reraised all in, and he called with...Jack/Ten. This hand didn't bust me, as I had more chips than the other guy, but it did cripple my stack, as I lost around 1.75 million. I managed to hang around until the final table and was the first to bust from that group for 9th place and a payout of just under $200. I outlasted 5,571 other players, making final table when there were 620 tables to start.

A disappointing result, given how close I came to potentially making top three, or even winning, but not if you consider that I could have easily busted out of the money all together. Luck is a factor, and this was the one hand where the luck didn't break in my favor. It had in other hands, or I had missed flops in pots that couldn't cripple me. All in all, I thought I played very solid poker for a relative amateur. I obviously wished I had finished higher, and that I had gotten around to baking those Christmas cookies, but all in all it was a great learning experience if I'm serious about getting good at poker. And I think I am.

Introduction to a Poker Neophyte

Who am I?  I am, among many other things, a poker neophyte.  While I learned the very basics of poker when I was still a child (nothing beyond what hands beat what, which I usually needed reminding of every time us kids would play penny ante poker, a rarity in and of itself), I still knew next to nothing about the game when I would play low stakes games with other soldiers while I was in the Army.  These games were nothing fancy and hysterically played, with plenty of alcohol and some variations of the game (like "midnight baseball") that I've never seen before or since.  Poker at this level was just a fun way to pass the time, and occasionally earn a few bucks, but I knew nothing about starting hand requirements or pot odds.

Fast forward to this year, when I went to Vegas for the first time with my boyfriend.  We played only at the $1-2 tables, but I was hooked.  Looking back, it's amazing I only lost as much as I did, but I had a lot of fun with it, and starting thinking about how much fun it would be to go back, only with some actual skills.  This attraction to poker only deepened when I watched the final table of the 2008 WSOP Championship, and started reading some of the books my boyfriend has (including Harrington).  After we went to Atlantic City this fall and I improved on my results (I didn't go through my entire bankroll; in fact, I placed in the money in one tournament with 110 people to start), I decided that I'd like to improve my skills on a regular basis.  Since we live not particularly close to Vegas or AC (or any other place with legalized gambling), I turned to the internet.  

I've been playing online at Poker Stars for about two months now.  After an extremely rocky start ($1-2 tables online are NOT the same as $1-2 tables in a casino), I think I'm starting to make progress.  If that first disastrous day could be wiped out, I'd actually be ahead, but as it is I'm only slightly behind.  I've found the level that is generally comfortable for me ($3 and $5 dollar SNG tables) and seem to be competitive in pretty much every game I enter.  I also like entering some of the larger tournaments with small buy-ins ($5 to $11 dollars).  My best finish so far is 9th place in a $5.50 tournament that started with 5,280 people.  This, coupled with other finishes in the money or at least close to it, have led me to believe (erroneously?) that I may be developing some skill, and that with the proper patience, discipline, and luck, I could actually win one of these tournaments at some point in the foreseeable future.

The purpose of this blog is to have a forum to discuss my journey as I learn this incredibly complex game.  I'm still new enough to be making some pretty basic errors, and I hope that by putting things in writing I'll gain some insight into the areas I need to improve in most.  I welcome any and all people who stumble across this blog to post or e-mail their own interpretations of my plays.  

See you at the tables.

SGT RJ